Old, Stupid, and Sober

Well, it's Summerfest time here in Milwaukee. World's Largest Music Festival. I have a lot of really great memories of Summerfest (and just as many nights I hardly remember.) We haven't been for several years and now I know why. I'm done with Summerfest. That ship has sailed. It's a young persons game...or equally as fun for people my age who still like getting hammered and being obnoxious no matter how much it costs them. (For the record it costs $15 for parking; $15 for entry; and $6.50 a beer.)

What seemed like a good idea at the onset quickly turned sour and against my better judgement, I refused to pay attention to the clues right in front of me. I heard Hall and Oates were performing and thought they'd be at the Marcus Ampitheater. Upon further investigation, they were playing one of the other stages on opening night (clues #1 and #2.) I booked a babysitter with start time to be determined at a later date.

As the night got closer, I looked at the schedule to find the show didn't start until 10:15 p.m. (clue #3.) In addition, my son had a baseball game that was rescheduled for the same night. My husband and I were trying to figure out how to approach the whole thing and after looking at the bands playing earlier in the evening (none of which we wanted to see) we decided to head downtown after my son's baseball game at 8:00 p.m. (clue #4.)

Did I forget to mention that my husband was going because I wanted to? (For those of you who know him...clue #5.) Knowing that the stage was at the south end of the park, we of course parked at the north end in a lot close to the festival grounds (clue #6.) After getting in separate lines for entrance, one for women and one for men, we made our trek from the north end to the south end. Imagine walking through the crowds of people who have been there all day, or at least earlier than 8:30 p.m. (clue #7.) As we're getting closer to the stage, my husband is looking for a beer tent that serves Miller High Life. None were to be found and as he's ordering his Miller Genuine Draft in the plastic bottle, he is left regretting not stopping for the Blue Moon beer he saw a ways back (clue #8). (Did I mention my husband didn't really want to go in the first place?)

Now we are finally at our destination and a local band called Streetlife is butchering some cover tunes as I'm trying to weave my way up close, sensing that my husband is fine back further. I notice that unlike many of the stages we passed, this one does not have big screens to project what's happening on stage (clue #9.) So we settle on a spot and wait for the hour until Hall and Oates is set to start.

If I'm to find a silver lining, we did get to see the fireworks. Once those are over, the area begins to fill in and a group of incredibly obnoxious women set up camp right next to us as well as a tall man directly in front of me. After a bit, I grab my husbands arm and we move down a ways where there is a less obnoxious group of people.

Finally the show starts and they're playing all their hits and they sound great. While the conditions for seeing a show you are really interested in aren't great, I'm trying to make the most of it. After about 55 minutes, Darryl Hall says something like, "Thanks Milwaukee, we love you!" and walks off stage (clue #10.) At which time I think to myself that this has got to be some kind of joke. They want an encore after 55 minutes?

A few minutes later they walk back on stage, but by this point, I'm as pissed off as my husband has been all night and it's time to go home. The last thing I want to do is wait until the end of the show, fight the crowds to walk all the way back to our car, and then try to drive home in traffic and construction. So we walk back from the south end to the north end and my back is killing me from standing in one spot in my less than comfortable and supportive Converse shoes. (I'm sure the tension of the evening didn't help either.) And the whole way I am asking my husband what I was thinking and blaming him for not being the ying to my yang. Why was he not the voice of reason? To which he replies he's never liked Summerfest and maybe isn't really that big of a music fan either (clue #11 and final clue.)

Thus ends our big night out at Summerfest (or as my brother aptly refers to it...Bummerfest.) After talking to my sister-in-law about it, she came up for the perfect title to sum up my evening, "Old, Stupid, and Sober."